George W. Bush Resume

Would you hire this man to work in your company? If yes, please do so and save the world from this nightmare.

Past Work Experiences:

Ran for congress and lost.

Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.

Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas, company went bankrupt shortly after selling stock.

Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using tax-payer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago Cubs.

With fathers help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.

Accomplishments as Texas Governor:

Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.

Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog ridden city in America.

Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.

Set the record for most executions by any Governor in American history.

Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes, with the help of fathers appointments to the Supreme Court.

Accomplishments as president:
The Economy

Entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.

Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.

Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.

Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12 month period.

Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.

Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in US history.

Presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have.

Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.

In first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.

Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history.

Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period.

First president in US history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.

Ethics

First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.

First president in US history to enter office with a criminal record.

Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history.

Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.

Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated US law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.

Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any president in US history.

Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in US history.

Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history.

First US president to establish a secret shadow government.

Presidency is the most secretive and un-accountable of any in US history.

Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.

First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in US history.

After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in US history.

First president to run and hide when the US came under attack (and then lied, saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)

Failed to permit, in the 18 months following the 911 attacks, any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.

Lied again or failed to fulfill the pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive'.

Lied again or failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capital building. "After 18 months I have no leads and zero suspects."

Presided over the biggest energy crises in US history, and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.

Biggest life-time campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).

Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.

Election Ethics

Set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips of any other president in US history.

All-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.

Members of his cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history. The 'poorest' multi-millionaire, Condoleezza Rice, has an Exxon/Mobil oil tanker named after her).

Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.

Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US history.

In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the US has ever been since the civil war.

Diplomacy

First president in US history to openly order an unprovoked US attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation.

Attacked and took over two countries.

Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest his actions (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind: Marches

Dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.

First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the human rights commission. and from the elections monitoring board.

Refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war (no longer abiding by the Geneva Conventions), and refused United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 US elections).

Rendered the entire United Nations, by his own description, as 'irrelevant'.

Withdrew the USA from the International Criminal Court.

First president in US history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.

Took the biggest world sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).

First US president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view the United States presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.

With a policy of 'dis-engagement', created the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.

First US president in history to have the people of South Korea feel more threatened by the US than by their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
Records and References

At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving record has been erased and is not available)

AWOL from National Guard and Deserted the military during a time of war.

Refused to take drug tests or even answer any questions about drug use.

All records of tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to father's library, sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

All records of any SEC investigations into insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

All minutes of meetings for any public corporation for which he served on the board are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

Any records or minutes from meetings he or his VP attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public review.

For personal references please speak to his father or uncle James Baker (They can be reached at their offices of the Carlyle Group for war-profiteering.)